lack of production

My to do list is long. Yet today I got very very little done, just some laundry. Shorty and I are home alone so we went trick or treat bowling, then to the O Club for more Halloween goodies with our neighbor. Since High School Musical 3 came out this weekend we went to that. I have to say it ws very good. It is so refreshing to see a teen movie with only 1 kiss!! Shorty loved it, I didn't know she would already know some of the songs but sure enough she was singing along. So I think that CD will be on her Christmas list....maybe then we can take a break from Hanna Montana!

I watched the UFC PPV tonight, I was so disappointed in the Title fight with Silva v Cote. the fight ended in the 3rd round (the longest Silva fight yet!!) when Cote blew out his right knee. I don't think it would have gone much further than that anyways. J and I have a discussion as to who can beat Silva, I dont' think it is going to happen for quite some time. but what a bummer to see the fight end that quickly.

So I am lacking so much motivation I can't even head down to bed. the week is going to be starting much sooner than I am prepared. Monday is my volunteer day and then I work the rest of the week. I am hoping they don't send the child out of the room until Christmas. She did have some great days last week....followed by a bad one. So if she is going to life skills I am out of a job. I really enjoy my job with the kids. Although friday was crack day!! over half the class had on low riders. Oh and then there was the snot....so maybe my job isn't taht great!

Just what was she thinking?

I am working as an instructional aid for a developmental Kindergarten. Tuesday is Art day. so at 10:20 we line up and walk down the hall to art. life should be good right?? Ok we get there discover we are painting...so back to our room for paint smocks...then as we are in the process of putting them on the kids the teacher starts to pass out paint and brushes....to the kids with no smocks. I think only one managed to get paint on herself at that time. The project is going to be cool when it is done....if we don't loose our minds first! So then the kids are given the paper, paint, brushes, and object to paint. Well these are developmental kids, holding an object and getting paint on the edge to stamp with, well that's not so easy for some. I understand why the Art teacher feels stress, I feel stress when we are in there. Ok so done with the FIRST color, get up go to the sink, put your object in the sink, use 2 fingers to wash your paint brush, wash your hands then go sit down. Now give that instruction to any 5 year old and you are still going to have problems...did I mention these kids are developmenal? When I say developmental I'm talking kids with Autism, or sever learning disablities. So we get to the sink and start to play in the water, not washing our brushes, but look there are paint containers in the sink! Oh and they have piant in them...look at your object....So with help the kids manage to get that accomplished, then back to their seats. Where they are given MORE paint and a strip of cardboard, to paint the end. Again for some this is too much. But Like I said this IS going to be a cool project if it doesn't drive us crazy first! Again more painted fingers, friends, paint drips, and the idea of painting just the edge is difficult. Off to the sink for more washing...and painting my pants.... and our classmate who was blonde now has green hair...and our other friend has green freckles on his cheek.....OK done with that!! Back to our table with some crayons to make a broken line and fill the paper with them. some kids did...but they were not dark enough. so they had to do them again. Thankfully we were done with paint! I'm sure that they should be able to paint with a brush, they should be able to hold a pencil, but some kids lack the fine motor skills necessary to do so. Some kids are still at the finger painting skill level. so multi task project like this is just frustrating for the kids being told that their "masterpiece" isn't correct and then thrown into the trash. Its frustrating for us trying to get the task completed as directed.

the set up for the room is also difficult the kids loose line of sight with the teacher and loose focus on what they are to be doing. Some times I wonder if the teacher made a few changes if she would see more succes with all her classes.

I understand that we can't change all of education for those who don't fit inside the box...but when you have a group that are all in the same box shouldn't you work inside that box to get them all out. Main streaming does not work for all, so expecting everyone to be able to do the same project is unrealistic. I have seen the projects that the art teacher has done. The kids have done some very cool projects. I just wonder what the process of making those projects was like before I was with the group.

Are you listening?

Have you ever told someone something and then wonder did they hear me? Or are they jsut saying "yeah.....mmmhhhh....right...ok" but not really hearing the words you say? receintly I told someone what I wanted. But then when those things actually happened I was told "well thats not what you want'...Hello!! Did you not hear me? Where did they get the idea that I don't know what I am doing? I have no skills? I have no...no.... Do you even know me? How can the people in your life not know you when you flat out tell them THIS IS what I want. Why do I get compared with others who lack desire and motivation to improve the situation they are in. The choices I make are for presonal satisfaction, presonal development. and presonal growth. Pushing to complete a goal that I have made for myself....but its not the image others feel that I fit. So why should I put so much effort into what others think. why am I wasting my energy in justifying the choices that I make. My choices don't hurt anyone but benifit many....they are just not the ideal that is expected for me by others.

how 6 weeks can change your life.

So it's been a little over 6 weeks now. Just before my last post way back in August...well actually it was August 1st. We found out that Jeremy made Chief. It is pretty much the biggest advancement of his career and something he has truly worked hard for. Then over the next 6 weeks it was long hours, insane task that were put on them, ridiculous request...and 418 minutes of phone time used...and he says I talk on the phone alot! His were all 1 minute phone calls....Finally the training was over and the pinning happened. He can now wear the rank and his new uniforms. People will come to him for advice and of course he will go to others for advice.

I really didn't understand why they did all this..and during the training, which seemed to me more like hazing, I would ask Jeremy. He was so tired it would result in him snapping and me telling him where he could stick it. Finally on Sunday when I was taking him to the airport to fly to a seminar and having a couple nights of good sleep he started talking about things. so all those times they would task people, and of course there would be one fool who would fail...so they all failed...It was to teach them to work together, for so many years you are working to make yourself the top to make it to this place..that you forget to work as team..Also when they would break up the group and pull the leaders away...then watch the remaining guys fail...it was to get them to be stronger and become leaders.

So in the end everything worked out as it should. Amazing how a little sleep and 6 weeks can change your view on life.

My sisters keeper part 2

How disturbing. I finished the book this afternoon. I read over 200 pages this afternoon, only to finish in tears. The whole family goes through this media filled court case, and Anna wins the right to make her own medical decisions. then on the way home, she is in a car that is hit by a truck and she is killed. Her Attorney has her POA and rather than forcing her parents to make the choice he does it for them, and has ther organs donated. the kidneys go to her sister, who ends up undergoing a major battle to live but does in the end. Then the last chapter of the books talks about the results of her death. the guilt, the drinking, and the success of the other members of her family. But how totally heart breaking to read this book, and to have that outcome.

Oh and I did discover why the Attorney had a service dog. He has a seizure disorder, and the dog can identify when he is about to have on and get him to safty.

My sisters Keeper

I am currently reading "My sisters Keeper". My MOm gave me this book a couple years ago for Christmas and I am just now getting around to reading it. I have to say I am very upset. I have cried several times while reading it and am now so irrated with the mom sara. I hate that bitch! So basically the story is a bout a 13 year old girl who's older sister has Luekemia, and is going to die. Anna, was "created" to save her sisters life. So starting at birth they take her cord cells, then multipul blood transfusing and other blood related cells, to keep her sister alive. when she was 6 she they did a Bone Marrow Transplant and now at 13 her sister needs a Kidney. No one has ever asked Anna, no ethic's committe has looked at the case, because they are sisters and the parents (or parent) agrees this would be the best. So Anna has hired an attorney to help her NOT give her sister a kidney. Needless to say this whole book take place over 2 weeks. there have been several times in the book that have upset me. Like when Kate learns Anna has filed a law suit for her own medical decisions. She says its ok, but please keep being my friend, cause I dont' have any friends. And when Kate is in the hospital, Anna sneeks in to be with her because she doesn't know who she is with out her sister. Last night I got to the point of the first BMT when Anna was 6, the mom is with Kate and the Dad with Anna, the Dad comes to get Mom cause Anna is crying for her. Her answer is "I am too busy with Kate, I can't leave her" finally she does and although Anna is in pain she doesn't comfort her but looks for a medical comfort and finds a shot to put her out. then Sara is pissed off that the dad gives Anna a locket for her special gift for her sister. Then there is a brother who is in nothing but trouble.....but the parents are too busy with kate illness to even notice him. The bad thing is that the Dr's say Kate is not strong enough for the Kidney transplant yet the mother is pushing hard for it to happen. So my thoughts keep roaming does she love Anna for being Anna or because she is saving Kate. Only a few more days and I will finish the book and know the answers.

Whidbey Island

I thought I'd start a blog about my life here on Whidbey Island. So starting today. whats new. Not much. I went for a walk along the shore, it was amazingly nice today, although only in the 60's I did end up taking my sweater off while I walked. the wind wasn't too bad. I earned my 1 million steps gold shirt today. I also made some fruit roll ups in my new food dehydrator. My little one was able to get into swim lessons and life seems pretty simple.

What will tomorrow bring? it is forcasted to rain so we will have to wait and see.............